Marie Kondo has a wonderful blog and there is one post in particular, "Finding Joy Within", I would like to share with you. She recently spoke with an award-winning clinical therapist and interpersonal architect Dr. Judith Coché. Dr. Coché says the most intimate relationship you can have with anyone in the world is the one you have with yourself. She also says that if there is an area in your life you don’t want to look at then that means you can absolutely deny it no longer. In fact, she says to put it under a microscope until you’ve cozied up to it and adjusted whatever needs adjusting. Basically make friends with your flaws or emotional pain. Also, speaking to yourself the way you would speak to a friend in need is the way we must speak to ourselves and this is vital.
For myself, tidying has allowed me to live a more fluid and fruitful life. When I was younger the vision for myself was very unclear. I loved art and languages and honestly interior design was my favorite thing. At times I would stay up all night thinking about how to redesign my room with furniture placement and paint colors. Tidying my room would give me a shiny new car feeling on the inside combined with insurmountable amounts of love for the hard work I had done. However, as my high school education was coming to an end I was told I should pursue business or something along those lines because it was a safer path. As you can see, my path was clear to me but I didn’t listen to my inner guide back then.
As I gained more wisdom in my later twenties, by removing physical clutter, I gained the insight as to what I wanted my life to look like. I struggled in college and couldn’t commit to a path towards earning my degree. The harder I tried the harder it became to complete school assignments and go to class. I decided something was trying to get my attention and put that goal on hold. When I did, I realized the goal to graduate college was never mine in the first place. It became clear that I was meant to start my own path and create a business that focused on helping people. I attribute the cultivation of this clarity to the removal of the things in my life that didn’t serve a purpose. In addition to college, I also discarded a car payment I didn’t want and a job I felt no longer fit with me. It may seem a bit reckless or irresponsible but I was desperate to feel an internal sense of peace and find my inner compass.
It’s rather funny that by becoming a college drop-out I made room for the life I wanted to manifest. My tidying business literally took off over night after I took the leap of faith to find what had been trying to find me all along. I liken it to a garden or a piece of earth that is covered in weeds and dirt with no defined boundaries or attractiveness. Once the unwanted organic material is removed, the vision for the space becomes clear and it even beckons one to then create something based on one’s inner desire. This is why tidying and caring for your home can be so powerful. By removing physical clutter, or what I like to call external noise, you can start to hear the voice of your inner guide as well.
By no means am I suggesting that anyone drop out of college or quit anything that you are currently doing. For me, this was what I needed to make my heart happy. To this day that inner guide speaks very loudly and very clearly because I’ve practiced listening and trusting its wisdom. I urge my clients to see their home and life this way and once they’ve begun to tidy, their lives take off like a rocket ship into places they never dreamed were possible. One client found her dream home soon after we tidied together, another lost a lot of weight and made adjustments to her home so that she could have a roommate and earn extra income, and several clients have reported just feeling good and are full of more energy and mental clarity in their living space after our tidying sessions.
Reflecting on all the work I’ve done with myself and my clients I’ve realized there’s nothing outside of me that can give me what I truly need on the inside. Adding too many material items to my living space, which includes when the fridge is too full or my car needs a good cleanup, actually makes me feel overwhelmed and anxious and most of my clients report feeling the same way. There’s something to be said for packing light and I urge you to try it for yourself.
Thanks for reading and to read the entire blog post by Dr. Coché you can go here.
photo credit: canva.com
I’ve worked with several clients this year and they’ve all said how grateful they are for the new found energy they’re experiencing as a result of our time tidying together. This is a great sign that speaks to how sensitive we are to the things we keep around us. One woman in her 70’s said she’s actually feeling a new sense of inspiration and is enjoying having guests stay at her home for long visits and is proud to show off her living space. She has the energy to entertain and when a guest needs something she knows exactly where to tell them to find it. Can you imagine that? Having energy to entertain guests and knowing exactly where all of your belongings are?
For me, as a KonMari consultant, this is the goal I have for all of my clients. No, not for your home to be perfectly tidy all the time, and No, not for you to live a minimalist lifestyle either, but for you to have more energy and inspiration to live life!! One of my clients is a school teacher and she avoided being in her office because of all the clutter. Just recently she reported that she now enjoys being in her office and working there. Every single visit since we finished the clothing category she thanks me for my help because she is astonished at how much energy she’s feeling after our sessions. That's it! That’s what the life-changing magic is all about. It’s about finding yourself, the beautiful, bright and shiny you that’s been buried underneath all of that clutter for so long.
Looking back on 2019 it’s surprising that I survived. We went through an entire home remodel and let’s just say I have to start all over with finding places to store my things. For a person that thrives in a tidy living space and having everything still in boxes, it’s been quite difficult to say the least. My hubby and I needed a break from the house project so we went to see "Knives Out" at the movies the other night. If you haven’t seen it, the main character Marta is not favored by all the other characters in the story but still manages to find goodness in her heart and always does the right thing. I’ve chosen to see my situation just as Marta’s. I can only control my reaction to my life and everything in it and it’s a lot more fun to be happy and joyful. My home will be tidy again soon enough and there is no use in being stressed out about it.
Some recommendations for the new year is Karen Kingston’s not-so-new book “Clearing Clutter with Feng Shui” on Audible. I recommend sitting down and taking notes while she, in her British accent, orates this wonderful book about how clutter can truly affect every part of your life for the good and the bad. My second recommendation is to read the magazine "Magnolia” December ‘19 issue, in particular A Note From Jo on Resolve. I had my family read this out loud during Christmas dinner and let’s just say it wasn’t only a tear-jerker but an uplifting life and goal changer. Joanna, if you ever read this, we are all looking up more often now because of your eloquently written letter.
Wishing you all a Happy New Year and to 2020 not just being for our hindsight!
Those scarf “organizers” that you hang in your closet don’t really help you to be any more organized than if you were to stuff all of your scarves into a box and put them on top of the closet. While they do hang together and they’re off the floor and all in one place they still get lost amongst each other and you aren’t able to see them very well. Scarves folded with the KonMari method you can open a drawer or basket and you will be able to see everything you have and it will be beautifully displayed.
C came to a KonMari presentation I gave at a local library and after learning the fundamentals of the KonMari method she decided she needed some help making her home spark more joy. This was her closet after we finished and she was ecstatic with what he had accomplished.
The above pics are the before shots. She’s reported that it feels like a necessity to keep her closet tidy and her urge to shop has dwindled. KonMari-ing your closet can save you money and keep you on track with your new tidying habits!
Yes, I’ve done it. I’m engaged and we are now embarking upon a home remodel in order to make what was my home now into our home. We took out a home loan to turn this dated mid-mod tri-level into a beautiful bungalow of love. Which means the Brady Bunch kitchen and old double pane windows will be discarded with gratitude. We will also be re-finishing the hardwood floors, turning the attached one car garage into a bedroom, and creating a laundry / mud room all to make these 1400 sq. ft. sparkle and shine the way it deserves. The decision to do this hasn’t been so easy. At first we thought buying a new house was the answer and after looking for several months and almost moving to Castle Rock, CO we decided it would be cheaper and a bit easier to remodel what we already have and what we have is a great location and a lot of room to grow. Please stay tuned as we update this post with a lot of before photos and hopefully by the end of Fall we will have a ton of after photos. The photos below are some of the before shots and I can’t wait to show you our progress!
**See our progress below!
6/18/19 - We’ve been slowly moving forward but today we dug our first hole. We had to prove to the city that the garage is on a 3 ft foundation so that we may turn it into a bedroom. We also got the plans for our kitchen remodel.
July 2, 2019
we decided to completely vacate and within 24 hours we found an apartment and a moving company.
July 3, 2019
This is what happened to our house just minutes after we completed our move out.
August 7, 2019
Another update! We’ve made a bit of progress! Do you think we will be ready to move in in a month?
The skylights went in last week and we will be ready for inspections early next week.
Well.....it’s been a while since my last update of the home remodel. A lot has happened and we hope to be moving back into our home in the next week or two. We are in love with all of the changes we’ve made and can’t wait to report another update when everything is finished. Remodeling a home is very challenging and I wouldn’t recommend it if you don’t have a designer on board. My hubby and I thought we could figure it out on our own but we ended up having to re-do a few things (eeek). Thanks for reading and we’d love to hear from you if you’re a diy-er and if you’ve had any fumbles along the way.
Marie Kondo received a lot of flack when she suggested that you "get rid of your books" (and she never actually said it quite like that) but this is what it looks like when you apply the KonMari Method to your books.
For some of us, we buy a book, read it, and then keep it on our book shelves (or nightstands, under our beds, in our basements, in the kitchen, in our cars...) However, books are meant to be read, not stored as relics or dust collectors.
As a Certified KonMari Consultant, I’m here to assure you that tidying your books is painless and very effective, but for those of you with a sensitivity to tidying books, you may not want to read any further for there are some shocking images following this message. :)
Step One: Gather all books from where they are stored and place them in one spot.
Step Two: Assess each title by asking yourself, if it’s something you haven’t read, will you read it, and if it’s something you have read, will you read it again.
Step Three: Once you have touched every book and magazine you own, lovingly place each one back on the shelf standing upright.
Finally, decide where to responsibly re-home the books you no longer wish to keep.
***No books were harmed before, during, or after this tidying lesson!**
When we empty our bag / briefcase on a regular basis not only does it allow us to keep it tidy, it also allows us to take care of any pending items on our to-do list that my be hidden inside. For myself, I have a dresser by my front door that I’ve converted into an art supplies storage-area and one of the drawers serves as the location where I keep the contents of my bag. I can only tell you don’t knock it until you try it! You will be able to more easily change bags in the AM when needed and it will keep you feeling light and full of joy when you show gratitude for the hard work that your bag endures on a daily basis. Each category has it’s own little zipper pouch that I purchased at Sprouts. This keeps everything neat and tidy and it keeps me from not digging through my bag in search of a single item.
Happy Tidying, Everyone!!